I Love You

Sometimes in life we get busy and we put things off until we have time to fulfill our dream.  Jobs, family, pregnancy and obligations keep us busy.  Part of marriage is not tolerating each other only, but romancing your spouse……say I love you for any reason daily, not just “love you” I can love cake and ice cream or the movies….really say ” I Love You” and take ownership of the feelings you are expressing. It is a bond not only in marriage but in your faith in God. Marriage is a long-term commitment not to be taken lightly.

This year Valentine’s Day is on a Tuesday; therefore, many of us will be working during the day. In the morning, send a little note to your significant other wishing them a good day, and if time permits, have a lunch date.

Enjoy the day all day long, with little messages, notes, a special breakfast that all lead up to dinner. But always keeping in mind, this is not the only day that we share our love with our significant other, it is daily.

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Why To Lose Your Guy By Valentine’s Day

 

Today’s Valentine blog is brought to you by Rinat Halon, a Colleague of ours in the wedding industry.

I love photographing weddings because everyone is beautiful and happy on this day.  It is a day when deep meaningful vows are exchanged, a great party is planned and the couple’s sparking exit lights up the path to their happily ever after; that is, except for the 50% of married couples who divorce.

Recently I watched the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days—remember this movie? Spoiler alert, if you haven’t seen it, here’s a fair warning that you’re about to find out!   I was in bed watching Andie, the main female character, become more and more needy in her behavior toward Benjamin, her love interest. With every needy behavior Andie exhibited, I slipped deeper under the blanket, thinking to myself “oh no, I’ve done that before!” This type of behavior normally sends men running in the opposite direction but Benjamin stayed. Why? I’ll get to that—keep reading.

Valentine’s Day is “the day of atonement” for single women everywhere. If you are currently not married or in a relationship, you’d pretty much rather be dead. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve heard single women say they hate Valentine’s Day. Poor St. Valentine, he meant so well!

The thing is, Valentine’s Day is about celebrating love and as my friend, Cathleen Pope says, “True love doesn’t just happen, true love is built.” So if you are alone this year on Valentine’s Day, it is probably the best thing that could happen to you. That means you are NOT with a man who is not sure about you, a man who is only there for the good times, or a man who just doesn’t deserve you. So if your man wants to walk out on you saying you are too needy, you are asking for too much, and it’s going too fast, guess what,  he is not your valentine and you are better off losing him before Valentine’s Day.

After 18 years of photographing weddings, I can honestly say that the couples who make a mutual decision to go through the tough times together, stay together. So when the going gets tough, it’s not time to turn your back and run, it’s time to grab your love’s hand and jump in head first because like everything else, the only way out of the tough times is through them.

In his book, Take the Stairs, Rory Vaden writes about a natural phenomenon that occurs when a storm approaches. Cows sensing the storm try to run away from it, but the storm catches up with them anyway. Buffalo on the other hand, are very unique for the animal kingdom, they turn and charge directly into the storm and  run straight through it.  A marriage is about mutual respect, forgiveness and many, many, MANY second chances. If a man cannot commit to you 100% this Valentine’s Day, he will not make it running through the storm of marriage with you.

Going back to How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, Andie actually tried to lose Benjamin on purpose because the whole thing was a setup for a magazine article she was writing. The one thing Andie did not know was that Benjamin had a bet with his colleagues that he would make Andie fall in love with him. Because of that bet, Benjamin endured Andie’s behavior ; behavior that usually sends a guy running in the opposite direction. Andie who just cannot seem to shake Benjamin, cranks up the crazy; but to her surprise, Benjamin, who is suffering so much at this point and would rather be getting his teeth pulled, won’t budge.  The most peculiar thing happens,  Andie and Benjamin truly fall in love.

They fell in love because they went through the storm together. They got through the good, the bad, and the ugly cry  together. They saw each other’s not-so-flattering sides and survived to tell about it. This is the part of a couple’s journey where true love is born. The kind of love that leads to a happy, dedicated, everlasting marriage.

So this Valentine’s Day, celebrate being alone. Celebrate knowing that you let go of the guy that was not 100% sure about you and in doing so, you made room for the awesome guy who is all in and the man who appreciates all you are.   You have also made room for the man who loves you despite your faults, and trusts you with his heart, knowing that you are also all in and  willing to say you’re sorry and try again a different way.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Call me when he proposes and you need a wedding photographer

To see Rinat’s wedding photography portfolio and inquire date availability go to halonwp.com

 

Dateless on Valentine’s Day

Let’s face it, for those that are single, Valentine’s Day can be one of the loneliest and longest days of the year, especially as you lead up to the day.  We have all been there at some point in our lives.

I remember early on in my dating life, getting ready for a date and buying the perfect dress and making plans with a young man to go out to dinner.  I was so excited, new dress, perfect hair and a great day to go out for dinner for two at a romantic place. This was my boyfriend that I had been dating a year.  My pick up time was 5pm for reservations at 6pm.  I was ready on time and sat in the living room waiting with my parents for my date to arrive. As I sat there waiting 5:05pm came, 5:15pm came, I thought this is strange he is never late, he as a matter of fact was always early.  I thought maybe he got stuck in traffic since he had recently moved three towns away from our house.  I called and no answer.  I waited and waited.  My parents knew right away something was not right but they tried to remain supportive through the wait as they watched their daughter’s  soon to be happy face turn to tears. Finally at 6:30pm, mom and dad said , ” I am sorry that he never came.” I was devastated.

I threw on a jacket and some boots over my dress and said I am going out for a drive.  I ended up at the local arcade to just hang out and play games alone.  It was pretty quite as most kids were either out on dates or just home too embarrassed to be seen without a date.

Just when I was about to leave, I saw a friend of mine we will call him “Jake” and he asked what I was doing there all dressed up (although a jean jacket and boots over a nice dress is kind of the fashion crime of the day!), I sheepishly replied that I was stood up.  He looked at me and said, “let’s go hang out for a bit, you can’t be dateless on a night like this.”  Everything was already packed being Valentine’s Day or too expensive for kids on a budget, so we ended up at Chuck E. Cheese (don’t laugh!).  We were the only ones in the show section of the place as by this time it was almost 8:30pm at night.  The manager brought us some pizza and a flower vase with a red rose in it and said you kids enjoy.  We put coins in the juke box to play songs and danced to a few fun songs and a slow dance.  We laughed and I felt better at not having to spend Valentine’s Day alone.  My friend “Jake” turned one of the most romantic days of the year in to a friend date that I would remember and treasure forever.

“Jake” and I were friends so there was never any sparks there.  A few years later he met a wonderful girl and got married right after college.  As for the guy that stood me up, I found out that he had met someone else when he moved away and he started dating her at the same time as me and well the rest is history.

So on this Valentine’s Day, do not feel alone if you do not have a special someone to be with.  Make it a girlfriend’s night out, or pamper yourself with a massage, pedicure, facial or a good book to read and celebrate you.  Love yourself!

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Celebrating Valentine’s Day on a Budget

Valentine’s day comes around every year on February 14th and this is the day that some men cringe at.  The reason they cringe is not because they are not romantic, it is because Valentine’s day has become such a pardon the expression, marketing holiday, that no sooner than December 26th is here, Valentine’s cards and items show up at the stores.  It has become on the ranks of holidays next to Christmas one of the most expensive holidays there is.

The women want romance and the men would love nothing more than to provide it, but the problem is that restaurants have increased their price on eating out to an almost $150 per couple meal ( with alcohol extra) and with that, getting a gift or entertainment, the gentleman has spent at the very least $500 dollars for one day.  Don’t get me wrong, I like the fancy dinner just as anyone else would, but when you think about it, you can save a bit and enjoy this very same place on a non holiday and still have romance.

Today let me take you on a virtual trip to Morroco.  Yes ladies, let’s get creative. Gentlemen, don’t worry this won’t cost you an arm and a leg and you will have some money left over in your wallet.  First of all if you want the beautiful romantic restaurant overlooking the water, downtown, fireworks, or anything like that, reserve that location the week before Valentine’s or after or a different month when it is not twice the price to eat there , you will enjoy it more and also you will not have as crowded a restaurant.

So let’s get in the kitchen, relax ladies and gents too, because  gone is the old style that the woman is the only one in the kitchen.  If you think that, you shall have to check out a couples cooking class and see for yourself.  This gives couples the opportunity to bond and do some cooking together in the kitchen, that may lead to some cooking elsewhere! I will leave that to your own imagination 🙂

But getting back to the table.  Setting an informal table for 2  is simple.  First of all, remember it is your romantic dinner and anything you do, will be great as long as your sweetie is with you.  Have fun with it.  It does not have to be so formal that  you do not enjoy the meal.  I had the opportunity to be on the Newlywed Guru show and help her talk a little bit about the setting up of an informal dinner table.  She decided that she loved the Moroccan culture and that she would set up a table using their typical style.  It was fun, creative and full of color.

Watch the video below, this will give you some tips on setting up an informal table.

This was so much fun setting up.  I thought about it and said what a great way to set up a romantic dinner for two.  It is different, easy, and very informal.  Most of all it is economical, it is not necessary to spend a lot of money because you are cooking at home.   I am sure you will have leftovers that you can take the next day to work for lunch (and if you add a little love note in your spouse’s lunch bag, you will be carrying the love longer as he remembers the romance of the night before).  Many of the dishes that you can prepare can be found on google  for recipes from Morrocco.

And if you want  to shop for some beautiful trendy Moroccan pieces to add to your home, visit this shop :

Enjoy your dinner it is a great one for Valentine’s Day if you want something exotic and fun with lots of reds and oranges for your decor.

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